"This is not to begrudge anyone their faith — whatever gets you through the night, brothers and sisters. Rather, it is to say that you should be free to have your faith govern your life but not to extend it to the governance of others’ lives." History In Real Time, New York Times, March 28, 2013The problem is created if you are convinced as a Christian it is your duty to protect against attacks against your religious beliefs. If God intended only a man and women should marry you feel compelled to oppose any decision going against what God intended. Most of us believe our religious beliefs trump secular laws.
What we are experiencing relative to gay rights and marriage is the same thing some Muslims are going through relative to Christians. If they believe all Christians are infidels and need to be killed, no secular government is going to change their mind.
I am leaning in favor of allowing gays to marry; however, perhaps I am going against some Catholic teachings and I will end up in hell. These issues are not easy.